


Healing The Pain

by captainamergirl



Category: Grey's Anatomy, Passions (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-08
Updated: 2017-08-08
Packaged: 2018-12-12 19:09:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11743329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainamergirl/pseuds/captainamergirl
Summary: "You deserve to be happy.”Gwen looked at Alex with a little, watery smile. “You know, I think I actually am.”





	Healing The Pain

“Am I anything like him?” Alex asked as they laid together one night in bed, limbs entangled, bodies naked and exposed.  
  
“Ethan?” Gwen said, feeling her stomach clutch.  
  
“Yeah… Am I?” Alex asked, strong arms cinching around her waist, fingertips whispering across her bare skin.  
  
Gwen spooned into his lanky body. “No. You’re nothing like him.”  
  
She felt Alex stiffen a bit behind her. She rolled over in bed and moved to face him, cupping his chiseled cheek in the palm of her hand. “That’s not a bad thing, Alex,” she said. “I loved Ethan but loving him cost me everything, _everything._ My sanity, my daughter, my son… His love was selfish and unreliable. He only seemed to want me when the other woman messed things up between them.”  
  
“You had kids?” Alex asked. The corners of his pretty eyes crinkled in concern. "You never told me that.”  
  
“Well, it’s not easy to talk about,” Gwen said. “You know some of my history but not everything. I had a daughter named Sarah but she died. She died because I got into a knock-down-drag-out with the other woman while I was pregnant… _Theresa._ Even now, it's hard to say her name. It shouldn’t be…”  
  
Alex offered her a little smile. “Well Theresa sounds like a real bitch.”  
  
Gwen’s lips twitched for a moment. “She was. But I wasn’t … I was far from innocent. It’s taken years to realize that. It took losing everything, hitting rock bottom, to see what my own obsession with holding onto Ethan cost me, and everyone else.”  
  
“And your son? Where’s he?” Alex asked.  
  
“Theresa is raising Jonathan,” Gwen said. The little smile that had been playing on her lips melted away. “After Ethan died, I tried to get custody of him but the judge said no way in hell was he letting an ex-con raise a child.” Gwen cringed involuntarily. “I still can’t believe I was in prison for almost two years… Why aren’t you running away from me when you hear stuff like this?”  
  
Alex reached out and stroked her cheek. “I’m not scared of your past. We’ve all done things we’re not proud of. I almost killed DeLuca the night I found him with Jo… I’ve pulled plenty of other shit in my lifetime too that’s nothing to write home about.”  
  
“I probably would have done worse if I saw what you saw.”  
  
“But it was a misunderstanding.”  
  
“Yes, I know but… Do you miss her?”  
  
Alex looked away for a long moment. He let out a loud sigh. “Yeah, sometimes, but I also know that she’s happy now with that Adam guy.”  
  
“Letting her go was hard for you.” It wasn’t a question. It was just understood.  
  
“Yeah.” Alex sighed again. “But we just didn’t make it in the end, no matter how hard we tried to work things out. Same as you and Ethan, I guess.”  
  
“Not the same at all, actually,” Gwen said. She struggled to a sitting position, pulling her knees to her chest and hugging them tightly. “Ethan could never love me the way I wanted him to, not the way Jo loved you and probably still does.”  
  
“His loss,” Alex said, placing his large hand on the small of her back. "But you cared about him so I am sorry you lost him… Cancer is one hell of a way to go too.”  
  
“I heard he really suffered in the end,” Gwen said. She rested her chin on her crossed arms. “Even though there were times I hated him as much as I loved him, I didn't want that for him. I mean, he left behind five children. They deserved to have their father.”  
  
“And what about what you deserve?”  
  
“What do I deserve?” She asked seriously.  
  
“To be happy, Gwen. You deserve to be happy.”  
  
Gwen looked at Alex with a little, watery smile. “You know, I think I actually am.”  
  
Alex smiled back, rubbing her back in slow circles. Gwen moved to touch his cheek. “This might not have started out as some grand love affair, Alex, but I do feel so much for you. Most of all, I appreciate the way you care about me; I appreciate that we are friends. That’s another thing I didn’t have with Ethan - true friendship.”  
  
“So does this make us friends with benefits?”  
  
 _“Best_ friends with benefits,” Gwen said. “Maybe I’m not Jo but-”  
  
“You’re Gwen,” Alex said. “And that’s okay by me.” He rose up on his elbows to kiss her, slipping his tongue into her mouth.  
  
Gwen laid back and gave herself over to the power of Alex Karev’s kisses. He was a natural-born healer. With each kiss, with each caress, he was soothing away much of the pain that she had nurtured in her heart for so long.


End file.
